What're you planting?

My wife and I play iPhone games. Lots of them, in fact. There's one (out of about a million of this type) where you plant and harvest crops, and that's part of an income stream that helps you level up and get more buildings and all that. The buildings give you money and XP too but the crops are the primary way of getting both.

Every so often she'll complain that I'm ahead of her in level and money. I always reply with the same question, "What've you got planted right now?" She'll get frustrated and annoyed with me but the plan fact of the matter is that I know that crops are the key to making progress in the game.

After I was disfellowshipped from the Jehovah's Witnesses and my appeal was denied, I really wasn't sure what to do. I wanted a closer relationship with God, I wanted that rift to heal and for me to find a positive spiritual direction, but I felt like I was drifting. Where did a former JW fit in the landscape of Christendom? I'd read the Bible in like three months, but that was more because I wanted something to tell the brothers when I applied for reinstatement. When my reinstatement petition was denied a few months after my appeal was, I was really lost.

But I began to feel closer and closer to God, working with His will in my life and really walking in harmony with Him. Oh wait, no I didn't, because I wasn't trying. I was feeling sorry for myself, asking lots of questions but not looking for answers, and generally speaking.. well, I didn't have any crops in the ground. And that didn't change for several years.

I don't know why I went through that desert, but I know it was at least partly my doing, and I credit a few people for being instrumental in getting me out. It didn't really start to gel for me, though, until I started looking around, started following web links, reading blogs, listening to messages, re-engaging in the entire spiritual process. I was nervous and skeptical at first; After all, I held (and still hold) beliefs that are contrary to what most Christians, who I would now call my fellow believers, hold. But does that change the good it has done for me? Has that prevented God from working in my life through other ministries? Has that caused me to close my heart to true understanding of God's grace, God's mercy, God's love? Of course not.

"Draw close to God, and He will draw close to you". Heard that a lot as a JW, but it applies outside the organization as well. Think of all the parables where the faithful harvest thirty, sixty, a hundredfold. But unless the seed is planted, unless the effort is made, there's no harvest. If we don't put ourselves out there, if we don't try to understand God, if we don't expose ourselves to His truth (which, perhaps unsurprisingly, differs from JW Truth in some sharply important regards) and really work to grasp what grace is all about, then we're not going to get what we need.

So where does one start? Read the Bible. Make it a point to read it every day. I was very, very aggressive about my schedule, and I was blessed for it. But now I'm not as aggressive (1 year target instead of 3 months) but I'm still blessed. And I'm seeing more than I saw the first time and the second time. My grandfather, I only recently discovered, read the Bible four times a year for years. I can't imagine he regretted spending any of that time in God's word. But if you're a former JW looking for a place to land and trying to figure out where you fit, I can't emphasize enough the importance of Bible reading. Even if you stick to the New World Translation, you'll make some pretty amazing discoveries (moreso if you can remove the filter the Society puts on some verses and chapters).

And although I've been hesitant to point anyone in any particular direction, I have to say that without Andy Stanley and North Point Ministries I wouldn't have had the turnaround that I did. Listen to virtually any message at http://www.northpoint.org/messages He's phenomenal and reveals the truth of God better than anyone I've heard. He takes God's word and makes it understandable and applicable and relevant, and I can't recommend him highly enough. And he rarely if ever mentions the Trinity, so that's good too. :)

But in any event, without that action, without that planting, we're not going to get anywhere. We're going to be adrift, lost, and always feeling slightly sorry for ourselves. And satan is perfectly happy to leave us there. So be it Andy Stanley or C.S. Lewis or just the Bible itself, reading and re-engaging is the absolutely critical first step in rebuilding your relationship with Jehovah. And always remember that your relationship with Him is just that: Your relationship with Him. Not with a group of people, not with 'anointed' Christians, not with an organization. With God. The Scriptures make that clear, if you give yourself the opportunity to discover that for yourself. And that's the first step to true Christian freedom.